TITLE: The Diner AUTHOR: Inluvwthfox CATEGORY: VA, Scully's POV RATING: Rated PG SPOILERS: Post Requiem SUMMARY: Scully begins a Mulder Journal ARCHIVE: Yes to Gossamer. Anywhere else would be lovely, but please ask first. DISCLAIMER: X-Files, Mulder and Scully, and everything related to X-Files belong to CC and 1013. I don't get payed for this, if I did I'D be having Mulder's baby. FEEDBACK: Welcomed with open arms at inluvwthfox@hotmail.com xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx I'm sitting here in the Diner again. I've been here every night since you've been gone. The people pass by my table like apparisions. I don't notice when the waitress refills my coffee cup. All I see are the street lights glittering on the rain dampened street and the droplets falling like tear drops down the glass window. I remember the first time we came to this place. It was the first night we had spent 'together,' I had tried to sneak out of your apartment but, it was as if you felt me leaving. You were instantly out of bed and asking me if I was hungry. We were the only ones here that night and the owner was nice enough to let us turn down the lights, turn the juke box up and slow dance the rest of the night. The owner and his wife even joined us on the 'dance floor.' The last day I saw you, you swore to me that this would be the first place we would go when you got back. I constantly relive that day in my mind. Wondering if I should have held on tighter, said that I Love You louder, or just let you go like I knew you would anyway. I remember begging you to take my necklace. You told me I was worrying over nothing, that Skinner was going to be with you and you probably wouldn't find anything that I couldn't dispell with a sound scientific reason. I made you put the necklace around your neck anyway, saying, "It just makes me feel better." I wonder if your wearing the necklace now. I never realized how important that necklace was to you. The night you told me how you slept with it on the whole time I was gone, my heart lept. I had never known someone who could put so much feeling on an inaniment object. Knowing you have the necklace makes me feel a little more secure, secure that the feel of it will make you think of me and hopefully, bring you back to me soon. All the things that we have seen and shared in these seven years, have changed my way of thinking so greatly. I believe that you are with 'them,' and I hope you are finding the truth that you need so badly to find. I have been working on finding my own truth's here. You would be amazed by some of the things that are going on here. The Lone Gunmen have turned your apartment into 'Ground Zero' for there research into what happened to you. They won't let me touch anything at your place. They claim that would be tampering with possible evidence. Skinner was sent before the Review Board after the 'incident.' He was asked to explain your disappearance and all he could tell them was that 'they' took you. He told me, he would not, could not deny what he saw, and he didn't. He defended you and the X-Files until they were convinced to keep the Files open and let me start a search for you. Sometimes I wonder where I should begin my search. Do I begin in the woods, or do I begin with your sister. I even pondered a conspiracy about your sister's death. I wondered if maybe she didn't really die. Maybe your with her now. I didn't understand how you could just walk into the woods that night and come back knowing that you sister was O.K. But, it was typical of you to be a little mysterious, so I didn't question it any further. I have questioned so many things since you've been gone, though. Do you care for me the way I do you? Or am I just an interest to you, like your flights of fancy to Rosewell or a Haunted House? I'm supposed to meet my new partner tommorrow. It seems strange not having you here to drag me off on some wild 'ghost' chase. I told Skinner I wanted to concentrate on finding you. That there was so much you needed to know and so many questions I needed answered. Oh, Mulder. I have never felt this empty before. It's weird. I can feel you but yet I ache for you. I feel so content to be carrying your child, yet I feel the pain that the child may never know it's father. I don't want this child to miss out on your smile, your laugh, or your love. I know you would love this child with all your heart. Even if you don't feel the same way about me. I have always noticed the connection you have with children. Maybe you feel the connection because of your sister. I decided, if this baby is a girl I am going to name her Samantha. After all, Samantha is the reason we are together. If she hadn't been abducted, you may have never opened The X-Files and they may not have placed me with you. I can't imagine what my life would have been like without you. Yes, we have had more than our share of problems, but the things we have seen and experienced together can never be matched by anyone else. I long for you at night. I toss around in my bed and wish you were there to comfort me. Sometimes, I think I can here you whispering in my ear, telling me everything is O.K., then I turn around to look at you and there isn't anyone there. You asked me once that if I had three wishes, what would they be. I now know the first one would be to have you back with me. When I sleep, I dream about how you will come back. Will it be in the middle of the night on a cold October or will it be many years from now. Will you remember me or will you have had all your memories wiped from your mind. Last night I had a dream that I went to the office on Monday and there you were, reading old 'box scores', like nothing had happened. But, every dream ends the same way. You always disappear just as I'm about to touch you. It's rained every night since I left the hospital. It's as if the Universe is sheding the tears that I am afraid to shed. I never stop thinking about you. When I get a chill, I worry that you may be cold, when I eat, I worry that you may be hungry. I look at the sky in hopes that I might see something, anything, that will let me know you are alright. Yet, there is nothing to see. As I look down at my cold cup of coffee, the waitress approaches my table. "I'm sorry, Miss Scully, but we're closing for the night." I nod in response, gather my things, and head for the door. The owner steps out of the back room and says, "We'll see you tomorrow, Dana." I nod. Yes, I'll be back tomorrow and every night until you fufill the promise you made the night you left. The End xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Author's Notes: This is my first story. I have read many fics and have always wanted to write one but, never got the nerve until I saw Requiem and knew how Scully would feel after losing Mulder. I would like to thank Jaime (SCULLY_M_) for keeping me going when I didn't feel like I could. You are a great friend. Please let me know what you think at inluvwthfox@hotmail.com Back to the mother ship!